“Mum can I have a orange bath bomb of Jasmine’s” I asked as I danced around the room. “Yup” I went up to the bathroom and grabbed one off the bath bombs and started to walk back down the stairs. As I almost reach the end of the stairs I clumsily fall down the last three stairs making a loud racket as Jasmine comes to the top of the stairs. She realises that it is her bath bomb. “Oh no she's a fighter.”
I really liked . . . because . . . I really liked the way you . . . I enjoyed reading this because . . . It was especially good when you . . . because . . .
I think you need to . . . because . . . Next time you write . . . Think about adding . . . Have you thought about . . . To improve your . . . try . . . Perhaps you could . . .
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I really liked . . . because . . .
I really liked the way you . . .
I enjoyed reading this because . . .
It was especially good when you . . . because . . .
I think you need to . . . because . . .
Next time you write . . .
Think about adding . . .
Have you thought about . . .
To improve your . . . try . . .
Perhaps you could . . .