Once upon a time there was a family who just moved into their new
mansion, but there was one thing they
didn’t know It was HAUNTED. So one night the kid needed to go to the toilet. When he was on his journey trying to find the
toilet it took him ages because the house is massive. Finally he said I found
the toilet so he went toilet but he didn’t wash his hands so when he came out
he heard something say “wash
your hands” so he
went back into the toilet and then he heard something like a gunshot then he
heard a girl scream “HELP.” He
was sprinting his heart out so he was running to his parents room but when he
came in they were DEAD so he was alone. He
was SCREAMING for help he even called 911 but they wouldn’t answer so he just
tried to go to sleep on the massive couch but then he felt a gun to his head
and BANG. But guess what, it was just a story.
No comments:
Post a Comment
I really liked . . . because . . .
I really liked the way you . . .
I enjoyed reading this because . . .
It was especially good when you . . . because . . .
I think you need to . . . because . . .
Next time you write . . .
Think about adding . . .
Have you thought about . . .
To improve your . . . try . . .
Perhaps you could . . .