Sunday, September 22, 2019

100 WC week 3# Ruby



Once upon A time in a fair land …..    OK that’s just boring so there was this very old man ,he lived in a very unfair     land to be honest , well that’s what he thought  He tells , the story's very different stories…. “ I was just young fellow “  he starts with “I was a  pretty sneaky one too all I  wanted was a  yellow bicycle but my mum and dad didn’t have enough money for it I was so desperate that my father warned me if I don’t stop bugging them than he’ll take away something that I already had . I knew that he was thinking that I’m being a greedily child. In my mind I was planning baggarly it’s 3am in the morning I’m out the back of bike barnI’ve got the bike “ “stop right there .oo ohhhh.
By -

3 comments:

  1. Mr G, Sheffield , UK (Team 100WC)September 29, 2019 at 12:19 PM

    Ooo I'm not at all sure what to feel here Ruby. Should I be sorry for the old (young?) man, or was he about to get what he deserved? It sounds like he was both sneaky and greedy so maybe he needed to learn a lesson?
    I wonder if you could take another look at the final sentence? I'm not sure what 'baggarly' means and could you adjust the punctuation to help that sentence flow a little more smoothly? (I also think you might have gone a little over the 100 Words)

    Well done though and keep rising to the Challenge.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. AnonymousNovember 13, 2019 at 12:51 PM

      It was meant to say burglary as in He slole something Ruby

      Delete
  2. AnonymousOctober 10, 2019 at 3:58 AM

    Hi Ruby
    Great story
    Keep up the great work

    ReplyDelete

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