“I need to go to the toilet” says Emma.
“Really can't you just hold it in “I say.
“Fine” said Emma
We jump the fence when nobody's watching and pretend to be normal and regularly walk towards the malls. I see massive ice cream cones and they were lime flavoured. We sat down on the grass and laid the picnic.`
“Oh I'm busting to go the the toilet” said Emma.
“Now you can go” I said.
After a while Emma comes back to the picnic.
“Did I miss it” she says.
“No” I said. Just that moment the fireworks started to explode, everyone screams with excitement. But I realised the the fireworks were coming really close.
"Bang" one of the malls were on fire and there was flames everywhere.
hi Rita
ReplyDeletei really like your weighting because you made it seem like real life
by Morgan
Rita,
ReplyDeleteI really liked the way you started your story with Emma needing to pee and all of a sudden the building ends in flames, maybe next time you could try using onomatopoeia.
From Olivia