It was a dark, stormy night. I heard rattling cans and rubbish outside. Orange leaves brushed against my window. I could hear my dad's deep snoring downstairs. I felt goosebumps shiver down my spine. I look outside my window to see the streetlight flickering. But then ...gradually, things started to move…
“ What's happening! “ I say in a worried voice. Things came crashing down, books falling on my head. I hear my parents hurry upstairs to come collect me and my brother. I fall down the stairs. We hurry outside. I was shivering, my brother crying, but then it suddenly happened.
No comments:
Post a Comment
I really liked . . . because . . .
I really liked the way you . . .
I enjoyed reading this because . . .
It was especially good when you . . . because . . .
I think you need to . . . because . . .
Next time you write . . .
Think about adding . . .
Have you thought about . . .
To improve your . . . try . . .
Perhaps you could . . .