Tuesday, February 4, 2020
100WC - Week #19 - Chloe
I came downstairs for breakfast. I had four weetbix. I bought a ticket for the crisis. It is open AT 7:00 Mum I need to be at the crisis a 7:00 ok be there i'm getting my nails done it is 6:58 ok downtown. We are at the crisis. It was not open although it was Saturday, nothing was open. but the food shop. Hang on mum where are all the kids and parents that come to the crisis it is popular around here o good point and where is your friends lets go home.
1 comment:
I really liked . . . because . . .
I really liked the way you . . .
I enjoyed reading this because . . .
It was especially good when you . . . because . . .
I think you need to . . . because . . .
Next time you write . . .
Think about adding . . .
Have you thought about . . .
To improve your . . . try . . .
Perhaps you could . . .
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Hi Chloe,
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed the first couple sentences of your story.
I just think that next time you need to add puncheon when someone is talking.
Continue enjoying writing.
From Samara